So often with our dogs there are expectations that we are attached to. For many of us, we begin to build a relationship by using a very common tool- training. In this sense, there are a LOT of expectations. We immediately begin to operate from a "should" conversation as in, this dog "should" sit, learn to lay down, be quiet when told to be quiet and should do these things in a class with other people and other dogs or when visitors (though we rarely have them) come to our home, he "should" not jump or pester them.
Hurm..
I think for many of us we are under extreme pressure in a class, especially at week 1, or when people visit our homes- we don't want to be embarrassed, we want to look good, we want to be liked, we want people to like our dogs. Oy- all of this swirling around in our heads AND we're supposed to teach the dogs something?
I'd like to suggest that we do a little less "skills training" in our own lives and a little more of this- getting a life (and allowing our dogs to get a life too). I'd like to suggest that if you want your dog to be relaxed- find some activities that YOU enjoy and begin to enrich YOUR life. So often it's all about the dogs (and heck, that's okay too), but when do I feel best and at peace? After a good hike in the sunshine. As a trainer do I spend minutes a day training my dogs? Nope, it's just here and there and as part of the routine. When do I feel like I'm most connecting with my dogs? When I'm being goofy, when I'm playing.
Play? What's that?
Give and take with no expectations.
So, lighten up. Commit to doing some things for YOU, that you've been putting off. You'll feel better, you might even been happier and I guarantee your dogs will notice too. Better yet, find activities that you both enjoy (and have no expectations).
